Thursday, March 31, 2011

Women Rock

Women Rock!

If I had the opportunity to live my life over, I would like to come back as a woman, again, without hesitation. That's a fact. I adore being a woman and all that entails. Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou sums it up beautifully.

It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman

I think women are the most powerful, special and divine creatures on earth and some of the best and most meaningful times of my life have been spent in the company of my sisterfriends.

There is nothing quite like the society of womanhood that nurtures, protects, grooms and loves with so much passion and distinction. I am who I am and what I am today because of life lessons learned at the knees of my mother, aunts and female cousins. I am a strong, resilient, independent and self-sufficient woman because of them. I pray that someday someone will be able to say the same of me.

Over the years, I have developed friendships with a small number of girlfriends that will last a lifetime. I love them like a sister and they love me back even when we get on each other's nerves. However, that's the beauty of it all. They have been there for me through thick and thin, flowing tears of joy and sadness, wonderful triumphs and devastating tragedy. My best girlfriends have comforted me during the death of my mother, celebrated my marriage and rejoiced in the birth of my children. There is so much history and that means everything to me...they know me as well as I know myself.

Girl talk over the phone that lasts for hours, unbridled laughter and gossip over drinks and dinner, making a six-hour road trip just because I asked, checking in on me when I'm not feeling well, supporting my dreams as if they are their own. There is truly something spectacular that encompasses a genuine circle of women. There is magic and power in their midst that rises up and transforms.

Not too long ago, I recall reading a short passage via the Internet; someone forwarded it to me. It focused on advice an elderly grandmother gave to her only granddaughter the night before her big wedding. She calmly and cautiously told her granddaughter no matter what happened in life, never let go of her friends. The young, soon to be bride reflected on how much she adored her future husband and how she couldn't wait to have his children; he was all she needed in her life. Then the grandmother wisely explained: Husbands may come and go, children grow up and take on lives of their own, but friendship, true friendship, is everlasting. Cling to it.

Sure enough, years later, the granddaughter and her husband had divorced, the children had graduated from college with careers and families of their own, but the granddaughter had adhered to her grandmother's advice and clung to her friends. They, her friends, were still there through it all.

I'll say it again, women absolutely rock!

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Friday, March 25, 2011

Carpe Diem --- Seize the Day

Carpe Diem
Tomorrow isn't promised.

I'm a bit sad right now. Have been for a few days.

And that's okay.

There will be times during our lifetimes when our spirits are in need of uplifting. We can't be upbeat all the time. Living comes with its ups and...downs.

Sometimes your life can be changed in the blink of an eye by an event that takes place.

That's all it takes...


To look up with a totally different set of eyes and perspective on life.

Life is precious. So short. You can be here today and gone tomorrow with the snap of your fingers.

Events can transform you. For good or bad.

Then questions start to haunt your mind.

1) Am I living life to the fullest?
2)Am I following my calling?
3)Is this it?

We can only pray that our living will not be in vain. I know I pray that when I take my final breath, I will have made a difference.

Big or small.

But make a difference. Leave the world a better place than the way you entered it.

I pray that at the end, God will say, "Well done."

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Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Why Do I Torture Myself?

I want to share this with you guys; I found it while surfing the net (and no, I don’t have anything else to do with my time. LOL) It is a piece I wrote circa 2001, 10 years ago when I was still a self-published author (well, actually I was POD, not even self-published yet). My vision still remains the same, which is very validating for me.

Why Do I Torture Myself?

Why do I torture myself? That's a question I've asked myself dozens of times over the last few months. I still haven't come up with a rational, logical answer; only an answer that I feel from the heart. You see, I'm a writer. That's a term, that until recently, I felt uncomfortable calling myself, but it's starting to feel more and more like a warm, cozy blanket on a cold, rainy day. The term writer embraces me and defines me as no other word has in the past.

I love to write; always have, always will. Writing takes me on journeys that I've never imagined before. Writing clears up all the clutter from everyday living. It's an amazing, powerful feeling to start with a word, then a sentence, and then to eventually create these wonderful, intriguing, fictitious characters that come to life on a piece of paper right before my eyes. I never know where I'm taking them or where there are taking me. These characters are figments of my imagination that readers embrace, be it to love them or hate them, as their own. Amazing.

I have an intimate love affair with the feel of crisp paper, colorful pens and a sturdy keyboard against my fingertips. I'm in heaven! I love the sound the keyboard makes as I type out my feelings and thoughts, word by word, page by page. Yeah, the power of words is awesome. Words can form opinions, change your attitude, make you happy, make you laugh when you want to cry. . . change your entire life.

I discovered this power at a very early age and it's never left me. I still remember the first time I read Terry McMillan's Disappearing Acts; I savored every page with a smile on my face and suffered heartfelt sadness as it ended. Yes, I appreciate and embrace the power of the written word. So, why do I torture myself? I do it because every time I think this self-publishing journey is too hard, or too competitive, or too expensive, or too this or too that. . . a little voice in the back of my head whispers for me to keep on keeping on. I have this strong, burning desire to be heard. I have stories to tell. It's that simple. That's my purpose in life.

No, I admit, my stories are not great pieces of literary work, I'll leave that to Toni Morrison, and I'm not trying to write the All American novel, but I have great stories to tell and fascinating stories to be heard. My wish is that I'm entertaining avid readers and maybe letting them take a look at themselves, a sister, a brother, an aunt. They can relate. They feel something if only for 200 pages. I'm taking them on a mini-vacation. And maybe, just maybe, by the time they have read the last page. . . they will take something positive away as well.

Yes, I'm a writer! I can scream that with pride and confidence because God has given me a measure of talent that I should utilize. Why do I torment myself? Because I have no choice when my inner voice is pushing me to follow my dream and to walk out on faith. With hard work, determination and drive, my voice can be heard as well. I have stories to tell.

Electa Rome Parks
Author of The Ties That Bind

Note: Electa Rome Parks published "The Ties That Bind" in May, 2001. It can be purchased through, bookstore and Email address:

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Friday, March 04, 2011

Ode to Writing

I think I've loved you since the first time we met.

There was just something about you that spoke to me, spoke to me with a passion and genuine honesty like never before. When I was in your presence, I realized my full potential, my destiny and became whole.

To this day, when I'm with you, I come alive. I burn with the fervor of a woman possessed. I can't get enough of you. Just the thought of being with you, makes my body ache and burn with desire.

You complete me. I know, I realize that's a very strong statement. But it's true, you make me whole. I couldn't imagine life without you. You're my beginning and end. My alpha and omega.

You're the keeper of my secrets and desires. You share my dreams as if they were your own. You delight in my triumphs. And my failures and hurt, you ease the pain with the stroke of a pen. You embrace me in loving arms with your magic and power.

When I become one with you, I feel...


In the deepest throes of my pain, just the thought of being without you, of not having you in my life. . . makes me so unbelievably sad. I can't phantom life without you. I need you. I desire you and I cling to you so desperately. Can't you see that?

We've had our ups and downs. I guess that's just part of life, part of every relationship. But I can't continue to live like this. Not knowing if you love me back. I think you do, but sometimes I'm not so sure. I shouldn't have to struggle and back pedal and take three steps forward to take one back. I shouldn't have to hustle every day of my life to prove my alliance. Don't tease me and make me work so hard to prove my love. I've shown you over and over again. I think I love you much more than you love me.

I realize I need you much more than you'll ever need me. I accept that fact that you have other friends in your life that love you just as much as I do. I'm willing to share as long as you will commit to me when you're with me. I adore you. Can't you see that? You are so beautiful. Only you can awaken my soul and create magic all around. I'm totally sprung.

I don't want to sound desperate and lonely, but I can't lose you, not now, not ever. I need you in my life like I need air to breath, eyes to see. You nourish my soul, my very being. I don't think I could go on without you. Does this give you pleasure? Pleasure that you have so much power over me?

Please try to understand. I can't, I will not, go on without you. Knowing I'd do almost anything to keep you in my life makes me take a good, hard look at myself. What type of woman am I?

How damaged I must be since I can't survive without you?

How desperate I must be to beg you to never leave me?

How deranged I must sound to love you even if you sometimes don't love me back?

See, I've loved you since the first time we met. And no matter what, I can't live without you.

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