Have You Ever?

Have You Ever?

Craving: an intense desire for some particular thing or person; a yearning

Have you ever craved someone so badly that you can’t think straight, you’re intoxicated with desire?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that all you can think about is the feel of his strong hands on your body, as they stroke, squeeze, roam to bring you pure, unadulterated pleasure?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that just the mere thought of him makes you shiver uncontrollably with lust; a soft moan escapes your throat as you cross and uncross your legs to contain the heat?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that he takes you there by his look, touch and masculine smell, his mouth on your neck, moving upward as he seductively whispers naughty words into your ear?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that you’re willing to leave all inhibitions at the door because with him you know it’ll be worth the erotic adventure your body longs for?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that when you close your eyes at night, all you can see is you and him caught up in the throes of heated passion, hotter than you have ever been?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that all you can think about is getting that next high, of being in his presence, of feeling his strokes deep inside taking you to ecstasy?

Have you ever craved someone so badly that you almost lost your mind?

I have. . .

There is one small problem. . . he doesn't crave me back. However, I intend to change all that!

Pilar, Diary of a Stalker 2009

Hate Him or Love Him. . . you still have to admit. . .

Terrell Owens is a lot of things -- narcissist, team cancer, fan of front-yard topless sit-ups during press conferences -- but you can never accuse him of not being fine.

Everybody who knows me KNOWS that I have been in full blown lust with Terrell Owens, AKA, T.O. since the first moment I saw his commercial advertising his not-so-popular reality show, The T.O. Show. Mind you, I'm not a sports fanatic or could even be described as an average sport's fan (sports is not my cup of tea). I had only heard of T.O. from listening to my husband speak of him and from random sport's reports; I knew T.O. had a tendency to run his mouth, alot. Translation: Terrell garnered a reputation as being arrogant, uncontrollable, not a team player and a loose cannon. When he opened his mouth to speak, there wasn't any telling what would come out and that made a lot of people nervous, I suppose.

All of that means absolutely nothing to me. I simply appreciate a fine, chocolate brother. . . and T.O. is definitely fine with a capital F. And oh, by the way, yes I did state that I am married. However, being married doesn't mean that a person is blind, deaf and dumb. I still have eyes.

Anyone who can look at T.O.'s photo and not readily admit his body is a piece of art, all by itself, is blind. I now understand and appreciate why artist will sculpture and paint canvases of people in the nude. The human body holds such beauty and strength.

However, I digress. The point of my tale is that after declaring my lust for T.O.(which in and of itself, makes me a cougar, I guess) and admitting my guilty pleasure is to watch his reality show every Monday night like clockwork, I didn't get a lot of love from my sistahs. Nope, I wasn't feeling the love, ladies.

I received responses and questions such as: I can't believe you are watching that show. How can you watch that show knowing his preference for non-African American women? Oh, I can't stomach his show and his taste in women. I can't stand, T.O. He's a joke. And the list goes on. . . I began to feel like I was betraying my sisterhood if I watched the show. However, lust beat out sisterhood. LOL.

I'm not going to lie; I admit I was a bit turned off as well when I discovered his preference appeared to be non African-American women (mainly white and exotic looking chicks). I definitely do not consider myself prejudice or racist in any form or fashion, however, I also do not condone when one person decides to date exclusively outside their own race. It's one thing to fall in love with someone outside your race, but it's entirely different to actively seek them out, exclusively. My mind can't logically wrap around that mindset. I seriously question how can you hate what you come from? I can't understand that rationale because even if you were hurt in the past, one bad apple doesn't make the entire batch rotten.

The amateur psychologist in me didn't miss the fact that during an episode of his reality show, T.O. spoke to a group of high school football players. In fact, they were from his former high school, a small town in Alabama. T.O. sadly spoke of not having a great high school experience.

1. He was only an average football player; never revealed an inkling of the beast he is on the field now.
2. He was raised by his grandmother (whom he loves dearly). Still, it's hard for a young person, especially a boy, to be raised by an older adult.
3. He was called names such as darkie, blackie, ugly, etc. This wasn't great for his self-esteem.
4. Girls were not attracted to him, at all.

So. . . now that he is successful, he's not attracted to women who didn't want him. Black women represent the rejection and hurt he suffered in high school, i.e. Wesley Snipes.

Just my take on things. . .

Bottom line: T.O. can date whomever he wants to (that's his prerogative); it's his life and he's rich, successful and powerful. And as an added bonus, he has a gorgeous smile and dimples. . . dangerous combination. T.O. can do whatever the hell he wants to. If the sistahs don't make him happy and he's not attracted to us, then so be it. However, that still doesn't take away for the fact that the man's body is a work of art!

T.O. is fine. . .and there is nothing sexier than a fine, chocolate, southern brother.

Amen. Amen.